When we first started planning the LiFE AFTER: SPiFF (Pop-Up), it was literally just that– a pop-up shop for you to come through to see and cop the new gear I’d been working on all summer. But with every ube latte chugged at Nirvana Soul, more and more ideas came to light from the fusion dance of creative minds powered by caffeine, turning this into the most ambitious event our brand has ever hosted. Since there’s so much going on, we figured that we should break down the top five reasons you should be at our first ever interactive Pop-Up shop.
Let’s get this one out of the way first since it’s likely the most obvious reason. If you’ve been rocking with SPiFF P. for a while now, you already know that the streetwear we put out has evolved to the point where the quality of the gear matches the quality of the ideas and concepts behind them. This time around I revisited old designs I had produced and remixed them to give the OG supporters something to feel nostalgic about and the newer members of our community a chance to learn about our roots through our clothing.
In all honesty, I could write an entire essay on the thought process behind each of these pieces, so it might be better if you just come to the event and let me excitedly rant to you about it in person. Lemme give you the TLDR of sorts (Pictures included lol).
At LiFE AFTER: SPiFF you’ll be able to cop the:
Each of these are printed on everyone’s favorite blank produced by Los Angeles Apparel; the mock neck-type collar, cozy, heavyweight feel, and slightly baggy fit make it the go-to tee for almost every streetwear brand to add their designs on. It’s def on the pricier end and this isn’t an ad for them, so I wanted to give you a heads up as to why you’re paying $45+ for a tee :) lol.
We’ll also be doing some in-person deals for the gear from our previous collections, so if you’ve been eyeing some of our pieces, this is the best chance to cop!
I’ve always been the type to put my own spin on the gear that I drop. It hella hypes me up to think that when I crop a SPiFF tee, paint a dragon on a sleeve, iron on a patch, or whatever else my mind could think of, I’m instantly creating a 1/1 piece of clothing that no one else has; I’m getting to the point where I always want to customize and add my personal touch to all the SPiFF gear I rock. So for this event, I wanted to give y’all a taste of that feeling– thanks to the homie, Juliette, it’s actually possible.
Juliette graciously agreed to come through to the event and spend the first 2.5 hours as an in-house seamstress, offering to customize any SPiFF gear you got, on the spot. All you gotta do is buy some clothes along with one of our customization packs (filled with 3 different patches, the first ever SPiFF Croc Charms made by the one and only @davidgotkicks, and event exclusive buttons), and boom: free customization (tips for Juliette appreciated tho LOL). We’ll have a range of different options for you to choose from and examples of what's possible on display for you to be amazed at. haha
I legit can’t express how insanely stoked I am for our event to be offering this service for y’all– I hope that seeing someone alter some SPiFFwear right in front of you will serve as the inspiration you need to realize that you’re one step away from making your fits and vibe completely different.
Its like a metaphor for what it’ll take to change your life, ya feel? No? Nvm. lol
A few years back, the homie Missile Toad and I set out to throw our own event that he could DJ at. It was in planning that music showcase that I ended up meeting my girlfriend, Priscilla, who is a big reason LiFE AFTER: SPiFF is even happening. This SPiFF version of the Avengers had the power of youth on their side, but we quickly realized that we had no idea what we were really doing, resulting in absolutely nothing happening LOL.
But all these years, I kept the idea of having a space to showcase M. Toad and the rest of our creative homies in the back pocket of the raw denim I was trying to fade. As SPiFF further developed to what it is today, we made the efforts to understand what it would actually take to successfully host the space we imagined back then.
I truly hate starting something and not finishing it, so I’m happy to finally cross this off the bucket list with a lineup of artists that I can’t wait for y’all to see perform. In this next week, we’ll be announcing who exactly you’ll get the chance to see perform live on our social media pages, so I’ma just leave it at that for now.
Literally a few days ago, I met with one of my favorite videographers and creatives that I know aka Andrew Street. As I was explaining to him the concepts and activities for the event to prep him for the video he was going to create the day of the pop-up, he asked me a question that I thought I had the answer to.
“What makes this event different from every other pop-up?”
He was pretty much wondering what he was going to document that would make this video more than just a tiktok or reel you mindlessly scroll passed while on the toilet. Lmao Pretty much the hard-hitting question that I needed to hear to really make this the interactive SPiFF Pop-Up I claimed that it was.
After some careful consideration, I realized that if I wanted this event to truly involve the community of people who took the time out of their day to show up for us, we had to orchestrate something that involved them in the creation process of our brand.
What better way to do that than to offer the chance to be a model in our lookbook for the next collection of gear and work with the photographers and videographers that have helped mold the look of SPiFF?
No modeling experience is necessary; all we want is people who are down to come through to the event right when it starts and be in front of the camera. We’ll have the lovely @jzr_yl there to help with posing, @DeluxeJP, @Upsigh.down, and a few others there to take your photo, and @__Universal_ + @Arvizzy there to get some video clips.
Given that we have a somewhat limited timeframe to get this done, I’ll be doing a casting call where I have anyone interested DM me for the chance to get some free gear, be styled by the team, and model the LiFE AFTER: Collection as well as some hand-made pieces. We’ll ideally get the chance to work with at least 5 of y’all who are interested!
If you still want to take some pics and vids in our gear but can’t make it in time to model, we’ll also be setting up an area that’ll serve as a photobooth of sorts. We’d love for y’all to enjoy yourselves there, send us the photos/vids, and also be featured in the lookbook!
I legit can go on and on (already kinda have haha) about the reasons you should be at LiFE AFTER: SPiFF, but I feel like the main reason I’d love to have you there is to get a chance to check out the art I’ll be showcasing while meeting the other members of the SPiFF community at the coffee shop I spent my whole summer at, aka Nirvana Soul.
From the moment I started planning this pop-up with my team, I immediately knew this coffee shop was the perfect location for it because it reminded me so much of the vibes that let me thrive in the early days of SPiFF when I had nowhere to work except the local spots that played rad music and served addicting coffee.
Their San Jose location and all the individuals who are a part of their community are some of the most welcoming people I’ve had the pleasure of interacting with. Everytime I stepped into Nirvana Soul I was greeted with a kind hello and a wave of positive energy that set the tone for the 4-hour SPiFF work seshes I was about to dive into. As if that wasn’t enough, they served every Filipino with a caffeine addiction their favorite drink ever– Ube Lattes. S/O to the boy Eliud for putting me on. Lol
If anything, having LiFE AFTER: SPiFF at Nirvana Soul is my way of saying thank you to the space that gave both SPiFF and I the push we needed to make the most of my summer vacation and set the brand up for success for the rest of the year. Now that I’m back to teaching in SF, I won’t get to be here as much as I used to be, but my hope is that anyone who comes through on Sept. 3rd will fall in love with Nirvana and replace me as the new regular until my next break.
Event info: https://fb.me/e/4jM0Jia19]]>I never felt comfortable celebrating a new year of my life when I was younger because as sad as it sounds, I couldn’t really see what there was to be so excited about. But the past few years, I’ve decided to treat my birthday as a time to reflect on how far I’ve gotten when it comes to reaching my dreams—specifically how far I’ve taken SPiFF Passé.
]]>I never felt comfortable celebrating a new year of my life because as sad as it sounds, I couldn’t really see what there was to be so excited about. But the past few years, I’ve decided to treat my birthday as a time to reflect on how far I’ve gotten when it comes to reaching my dreams—specifically how far I’ve taken SPiFF Passé.
Recently, I decided that I didn’t want to see things that way anymore. I wanted to give myself a reason to celebrate. To do that, I’ve made my birthday an occasion where I do something rad with SPiFF. Last year I did a giveaway for a 1/1 custom SPiFF piece; this year I decided to drop the 100% Deku Collection.
It’s my way of hyping up a day in my life that I wrongly tricked myself into thinking didn’t matter. It’s my way of showing myself that I’m happy I get to be around for another year.
I worked my butt off to get this drop ready by this weekend with the help of a ton of other rad creators because I want to show myself where SPiFF is now after a year of breaking all the way down and building myself all the way back up. Honestly, after the rollercoaster of a year that I just had, it’d be nice to see how many people I’ve impacted through the streetwear I design, art I draw, and videos I’ve made.
I’ve never been good at celebrating my birthday.
But I realize now, that it’s cause I’ve always felt alone. So this year it’s kinda nice that thanks to all y’all, I don’t feel so lonely.
“I understand now more than ever, that even if you see the path of success in front of you, you still have to take the steps to get you on your way. For years now, I’ve seen the right moves. I made the right calls in my head, but I was stuck in the sidelines, satisfied with just seeing someone else win. But now I am confident enough to understand that I could win too. I don't have to sit and watch as the days go by; I owe it to myself to play the game and take my L or dub gracefully.”
]]>“I understand now more than ever, that even if you see the path of success in front of you, you still have to take the steps to get you on your way. For years now, I’ve seen the right moves. I made the right calls in my head, but I was stuck in the sidelines, satisfied with just seeing someone else win. But now I am confident enough to understand that I could win too. I don't have to sit and watch as the days go by; I owe it to myself to play the game and take my L or dub gracefully.”
There was a time where I thought I could drop SPiFF gear with no lengthy explanation about the process behind what I do paired with a thorough description of the energy that goes into each piece to justify why you should care about my art and why I had to price things the way I did. I can’t deny that it doesn't feel fair that I see other brands getting the full support of the masses for no other reason besides hype built off the cosign of today’s favorite artists and celebrities.
The younger me used to think that was all I needed for everyone to love what I was creating. In my head, it was deceptively simple.
People made cool shit, so people bought cool shit.
Given that genius logic, I figured that if I made cool shit, people would buy it too.
Right? Wrong.
That’s how it works at first when you got what we know as beginner’s luck. But when you’re 2-3 years in and your friends have supported you all they could, the game is completely different. Making some “cool shit” is no longer enough.
I’ve seen designs I poured my heart into initially fail because I didn’t put in enough effort into convincing y’all that once again what I was showcasing wasn't just another piece of SPiFF merch. I had to learn how to make collages, blog posts, videos, and even Tik Toks just to get y’all to understand that what you’re copping is literally the most up-to-date physical embodiment of the years I spent learning how to bring my art to life.
What you’re supporting is the brand that I've bet my life on. I’m not exactly sure what moment it became clear that this is all I wanted to do, but I know now that this task has taken more dedication and effort than nearly anything I’ve done.
When I show you a SPiFF product, you often just see the final draft. You don’t see the process and time it took for me to create something that I was willing to showcase. A lot of what I do goes unnoticed, but when you support SPiFF and my art, everything I’ve been through up to this point feels worth it.
It all starts to feel worth it.
All I’ve worked for and sacrificed begins to make sense the moment one of you looks at what I’ve created and decides it’s worth showing love to because you understand my message. It’s those moments when you put on the gear and instantly know that what you’re rocking represents a community of overachieving underachievers who do whatever it takes to make their dreams a reality. Those moments when both you and I understand that all this was never about how cool SPiFF made you look--
it was always about how SPiFF made you feel.
This year my girlfriend inspired me to truly get organized when it comes to SPiFF, so I invested in my ideas and laid out a plan for each season. When I finally buckled down and got serious, of course all hell breaks loose. lol This new drop was born from having plans that were made months ahead destroyed in the blink of an eye.
I can’t really complain though.
Because of all the setbacks, I literally learned how to use my first ever sewing machine to crop hoodies with a more professional finish and add SPIFF Tags myself like I always wanted. As you can see from the images I’ve added throughout this blog, each cropped hoodie is repurposed from pieces from a past drop. They’re super limited and each contain that personal touch from your boy aka me. This was something I was actually mad nervous to take on, but now that I have these new skills under my belt, you’ll def be seeing more 1/1 SPiFF customs that I’ll release for y‘all to enjoy.
The sudden switch of plans also showed me that preparing ahead really does have its benefits. We used to only have one collection ready at a time, so if something went wrong, it was game over for a cool minute. But getting organized allowed me to move things around and still give y’all some new SPiFF to rock while dealing with the chaos known as delays. In a weird way, it kind of feels like the Shinobi Vest were actually destined to be next; I can’t really explain it, but I have a good feeling about how things played out.
A wise individual on some Twitter account that only posts lowkey cheesy, but true quotes once said, “Everything works out in the end. If things aren’t working out, then it's not the end.”
That person knew what they were talking about. lmao
I went all in for this collection and bet on my art and work ethic for the first time in what feels like ever. I put my heart into these designs, my mind into the marketing and distribution, and my soul into this drop.
I’ve released clothes for years now, but it always felt like I was holding back. After the initial high of starting a streetwear brand, I began to feel jaded by my lack of success and started to believe people who thought that nothing amazing happens here. The LIFE AFTER: Naota collection is my way of saying once again to all those who didn’t believe in my vision that it doesn’t matter to me whether I fail or succeed.
]]>When you hear Haruko tell Naota that in FLCL, it hits some weird heartstrings. I first heard it in middle school and interpreted it as me having to stop being so damn scared to talk to my crush, but when I rewatched the 6-episode anime in college, the phrase took on a whole new meaning. It suddenly became clear that “swinging the bat” was something I had never actually done.
Up until the moment I decided to start SPiFF Passé, my life had consisted of safe choice after safe choice; I would step up to the plate and never swing. After hearing Haruko’s words one more time as a lost college student in my apartment in SF, I asked myself how much longer I planned on living life without taking a risk.
When was I going to stop giving a damn if I struck out?
If there’s one anime that left a lasting impression on me, it’s FLCL. I stumbled upon it one Saturday night in middle school on Adult Swim because they ran a marathon of the entire 6-episode season that I couldn’t take my eyes off of.
The show is a coming-of-age story focused on Naota Nandaba that literally makes zero sense 75% of the time, but the organized confusion produced by its creator is what makes it dope. It’s like watching a series someone made based on an inside joke only they understood. All that you’re sure of is that our protagonist is still learning what it means and looks like to channel your emotions in a manner that allows for progress.
Every time I watch FLCL and witness Naota come face to face with absurd obstacle after absurd obstacle, I’m forced to think back to all I’ve been through and reflect on those moments where I let my emotions, whether it be happiness, sadness, or nervousness, get the best of me.
I’ve both overreacted and underreacted to situations in ways that will forever haunt me. It’s those little instances where you get too nervous to talk to the cute girl at the concert or those big L’s when you become someone you aren’t for the sake of “winning” an argument that tends to expose you to the truth that just like Naota, you’re still figuring it out.
I knew I’d encounter new experiences where striking out was better than not swinging at all, but how was I supposed to put myself in the position where I had the confidence to take on these high-speed pitches?
After nearly 4 years of being at college, I was close to getting my degree, but I didn't feel like I made any decisions or take any actions that would lead to the life I once dreamed of as that kid who stayed up way too late to watch FLCL. This feeling allowed me to grasp exactly what people meant when they said life comes at you fast. Time was flying by and nothing but my age seemed to be changing.
In that era of my life, it became abundantly clear that it was now or never. It was time to step up, close my eyes, and swing the bat to attain a life of no regret. A few months later, SPiFF Passé was formed-- I haven’t looked back since.
Maybe this streetwear with an anime influence thing I’ve been pushing wasn’t the right call. Maybe I should’ve listened to everyone else and stuck to something that was easier for the masses to appreciate.
But when you understand what those years of walking the line of success and regret taught me, you’ll realize that it never mattered if I hit a homerun or not; I simply couldn’t look myself in the mirror and be happy if I settled for less than I deserved because of a fear of failure and an unhealthy obsession with comfort.
This is the first time I’ve finished a blog post after the drop is pretty much done. I’ve put in the hours to market this all properly, and it’s been one week since preorders opened; they end tonight so we could start production and finally get y’all the gear.
Weirdly enough, this is one of the most successful drops SPiFF has ever had. I’ve been trying to figure out why that is and came to the conclusion that it’s because y’all see that for the first time in who knows how long, I’ve created something that is truly me.
FLCL set the standard for me as an artist, teaching me that the most enticing pieces were created from being true to yourself. I could always make art for others to enjoy, but my audience would be more captivated by work that successfully expressed an authentic version of myself. Putting together art that allows the viewer to interpret what it means to them is the key to composing work that has substance.
That in mind, I went all in for this collection and bet on my art and work ethic for the first time in what feels like ever. I put my heart into these designs, my mind into the marketing and distribution, and my soul into this drop.
I’ve designed clothes for years now, but it always felt like I was holding back. After the initial high of starting a streetwear brand, I began to feel jaded by my lack of success and started to believe people who thought that nothing amazing happens here. The LIFE AFTER: Naota collection is my way of saying once again to all those who didn’t believe in my vision that it doesn’t matter to me whether I fail or succeed.
I just want to be able to say I swung the bat.
My question is, have you?
SUPPORT THE BRAND: https://spiffpasse.com/
Personal IG: @ericearholes
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TLDR: In honor of George Floyd, Breonna Taylor, and all those who have lost their lives at the hands of the police, the SPiFFterns have come together to create 1/1 SPiFF pieces for a fundraiser raffle with all proceeds from ticket sales being donated to @blklivesmatter. From the moment I am writing this, we have already raised over $400; as an added bonus, a friend’s company is going to match whatever amount we donated (up to $2500). Here’s a direct link for you to check out what the SPiFFterns put together and see how the raffle works. We appreciate y’all for doing what you can to help!
https://spiffpasse.com/collections/frontpage/products/black-lives-matter-fundraiser-raffle
“There’s been a lot on my mind after hearing about the murder of George Floyd and a ton I want to say that many of y’all have already articulated. When it all comes down to it, we need change.
I’m not the best at figuring out exactly how to create the type of difference we clearly need, but if there’s one thing I can do, it’s ask this question: What matters most? Our issues with each other aside, what is truly important in this life that we share? If we can find that common ground between what we value, maybe the hate in this world will finally fade and leave us with what actually matters.
I’m just some random dude who runs a streetwear brand. I don’t know what I’m doing half the time, but for some reason you have given me your attention. As thankful as I am for the constant love and support, right now it’s crucial that you focus on the bigger picture. Right now, it’s crucial that we figure out how to change our society into one that actually understands what matters”
It’s been over a week since I wrote that. After initially sharing those thoughts and taking a step back in favor of bringing awareness to the Black Lives Matter movement and the fight against police brutality, I found myself more speechless than ever and feeling like my actions weren’t making a difference.
Witnessing another Black individual get murdered at the hands of a cop made me even more hyperaware of the privilege I had been living with my entire life; I quickly became overcome with guilt and disappointment for not fully realizing the magnitude of how unfair things were for the Black community and not being proactive about making a difference in our world sooner. It wasn’t that I was unaware of what people had been facing. The problem was that I had accepted that it wasn’t in my ability to change the world for those who weren’t as fortunate as I was-- I had subconsciously given up.
Luckily, many others hadn’t.
Even during the pandemic, people were fighting for justice in whatever way they knew how. Many engaged in the act of protesting, signed countless petitions, used their platform on social media to raise awareness, and donated their time, money, and energy to prove to the world what should have been clear in the first place: Black lives matter.
I could no longer stand here and accept my role as a bystander. I educated myself further about what was going on, reached out to others to gain perspective, and tried to figure out what I could do to ignite change and aid the fight against a society that was built for people of color to fail in. There is still much for me (and the world) to do and still an abundance I need to learn, but one thing that was within my reach as a high school teacher and streetwear brand owner was empower the younger generations to take action in the face of injustice and prevent them from giving up and feeling as helpless as I once did.
After seeing the SPiFFterns be so vocal in their support for the Black Lives Matter movement, I knew that this was the perfect opportunity to show them that they could make a difference through their actions and their passions. We quickly scheduled a zoom meeting, discussed our options, and came up with the idea to do a fundraiser raffle with all profits being donated to @blklivesmatter. People would cop tickets for a chance to win SPiFF gear they hand-customed along with other goodies from the brand.
This fundraiser was run by the youth. I took a step back, played the role of facilitator, and pushed the SPiFFterns to take over because I wanted them to represent the people their age and inspire those in their generation to take action. Through their efforts, I hope they grasped that there is always something that can be done to fight the injustices of the world and realized that there is never a reason to feel like your actions don’t make a difference.
When I had the SPiFFterns decide which pieces they wanted to create and include in the raffle, I asked them to express their thoughts about what was going on and give our community some insight behind the custom gear they were including. Art pieces in the form of streetwear, like the ones they crafted, can speak for themselves, but there’s a certain power that comes from the words we speak and share. Here’s what they had to say:
BLM should be seen as a challenge for everyone in America. People need to recognize the struggles that black people face every day. With my piece, I wanted to bring light to the lives lost due to the hands of the police. Many names become forgotten as justice is never served. Say their names, recognize their struggle, and do what needs to be done to make changes.
It is important for me to contribute to the BLM fundraiser because it’s a movement that needs everyone’s attention. The patches on this crew neck resemble how everything in our unjust system always seems to get covered up. The bleach splatters represent how the mess created by our system will always be seen no matter its attempts to be hidden. BLM should not be left untouched any longer. Change seems to create fear—making it difficult for us to achieve, but it is not impossible. We must all rise up TOGETHER. Let us be heard! BLACK LIVES MATTER!
I customized these two pieces right around the time that the BLM movement started to pick up in response to George Floyd (Rest In Power). I cannot speak for the other Spiffterns, but I found myself feeling useless and lost. I wasn’t sure how I could support the Black community without attending the protests. These pieces are an extension of the hope I have that we can keep the solidarity and energy of making sure our Black brothers and sisters know that they matter now and forever. I hope that these pieces can bring you a bit of joy in these trying times. Thank you for supporting us and the BLM movement!
]]>TLDR: We've dropped a preorder to the “Hero Essential” Tee meant to raise awareness and funds for those in the health field in need of protective gear in the fight against COVID-19. All profits from the shirt will be donated to support those in the health field in need of protective gear. Here's a link to the product:
https://spiffpasse.com/collections/frontpage/products/hero-essential-tee-preorder
“The hospital is a crazy place to be rn, so I’m tryna be as safe as I can.”
When I read that message from my good homie JC, one of the health workers putting his life at risk to take care of the many individuals impacted by COVID-19, I immediately felt uneasy and had no idea what I could do to help. We joked that we couldn’t even give each other a hug to comfort one another, so we’d save them for when this was all over. But that conversation burned a feeling of helplessness in my mind that I simply couldn’t shake.
The harsh reality that this was a battle affecting my immediate community along with the entire world was thrown in my face and I could no longer look away.
Arvie must have been feeling the same way because a week or so later he brought up to the team that we had to utilize our platform and streetwear brand to help out these essential workers all we could. He proposed that we make tees to raise money for the workers that needed it, so I immediately got to designing.
The phrase “unsung hero” quickly emerged in my head because the words perfectly described the individuals keeping the world running before the term “essential worker” gained its popularity. I figured I’d combine the two labels to create a new one that was more representative of this time and the people who we were attempting to support.
Minutes after doing a Dragonball Z-style fusion dance with the words, Arvie brought up using an anime character in the design (likely because I haven’t stopped drawing them since quarantine started lol). My mind immediately raced to the one and only Lemilion from Boku No Hero Academia (aka My Hero Academia).
SPOILER ALERT! (Skip this paragraph if you hate spoilers lol)
Lemillion is the epitome of a hard-working individual for a variety of reasons, but what truly gained Lemillion the respect of every fan this season was the effort he exerted as he tried to save Eri during his fight with Overhaul.
In the middle of the battle, Lemillion lost the powers he trained for years to develop but still had the confidence to say, “Nothing I’ve done up to now will ever be useless! I will always be Lemillion!”
“Nothing I’ve done up to now will ever be useless! I will always be Lemillion!”
The work he put in prior to that fight defined him as the hero he wanted to be; with or without his abilities, he was still Lemillion and would willingly sacrifice everything he had to defend the girl he was trying to save. At that moment, it appeared easy to dismiss him as a normal human, but his efforts from the past made him remain the hero he worked to be.
The parallels between his resilience and those of the people in the health field are uncanny. Both Lemillion and many essential workers are faced with what seemed to be an unbeatable enemy and are asked to go against it with the powers of an average human. None of the energy they’ve put in during their fights will ever be considered useless, and they will forever be cemented as heroes.
I could go on and on about what makes Lemillion the perfect symbol to represent today’s essential workers, but to keep things concise, just know that when I made these connections, I immediately knew what I had to do.
These tees dropped yesterday and within the first few hours of the release, we witnessed an overwhelming amount of support in the form of ordered tees, shared posts, and constant comments. For a few hours, it felt like my phone was going to blow up from how much love y’all showed the cause we’re working for. We’ll let the preorder stay up for a few more days before production begins; we appreciate y’all so much for doing what you can to help the individuals currently at the frontlines of this battle against a disease that I’m sure we’ll beat.
Being given the label “Hero” simply isn’t enough; there are a ton of essential workers out there who need to be given appropriate wages and benefits. But one thing we understand is that a hero is what all you essential workers are. Thank you for doing what you’re doing to keep society afloat. We truly hope the world is able to recognize the importance of your efforts and give y’all the compensation you deserve ASAP.
https://www.instagram.com/ericearholes/
SUPPORT THE BRAND:
Years after moving back from my apartment in SF (s/o 350 Arballo), my parent’s house remained filled with relics of the past 25 years of my life. Clothes I haven't seen in years, art pieces I never had the chance to hang up, old post-it notes from high school crushes, and a bunch of things that only held value in a sentimental form along with the entire inventory of Spiff Passé flooded our downstairs room.
I sacrificed having my own spot in favor of a creative space I could share with my homies and a car that would allow me to commute to all the places building Spiff would end up taking me. This meant that years after getting my teaching credentials, I was still sharing a room with my sister that was equally filled with crap.
I figured it was okay. My weeks are so filled with things I gotta do that I really just used my house as a place to sleep. But after meeting a girl like Priscilla, I quickly learned that I didn’t have to accept this fate; I had obligations that I committed my lifestyle to, but I also had the power to move on to something better without moving out just yet.
I simply had to clean, organize, and let go.
I’ve only had my own room for three years of my existence. The majority of my childhood was spent sleeping on the same bed as my parents and sis or crashing on couches and futons found in sections meant to be used as storage. The entirety of my college experience consisted of sharing a 2 bedroom apartment with 5 of my best friends, and when that was over, I was back to existing in the same room I shared with my sister when we were toddlers.
This became my norm, making it hard for me to see the possibility or need for a different type of living.
Everything is different now though.
I’m not as broke as I was in college.
I’m not coexisting with 11 other people in my house.
I’m not overly worried about where my life is headed or tripping over the same toxic relationship.
I’m not the same person anymore.
I could let go.
I was in the midst of planning the LIFE AFTER: Art show I was hosting with the homie, Sanaz aka the Sutro Footwear Legend, so you already know I had more on my plate than ever. But through countless trips to Ikea and HomeGoods, Priscilla put a vision in my head that I couldn’t shake and had to act on.
She was adamant that converting the downstairs dump fest into the Spiff E Homebase would theoretically give me the motivation to work harder and enjoy my time spent at home instead of succumbing to the literal messy view anxiety would often create in my space.
Having my free time and attention divided between dropping new LIFE AFTER: gear for Spiff P., planning and taking part in an art show, teaching 5 classes of high school seniors, and renovating my room left me feeling overwhelmed as hell in the best way possible. My life was moving in an upward direction in all aspects for the first time in what must’ve been years.
Then COVID-19 came along and highkey ruined everything.
The pandemic was clearly getting worse by the day, affecting countless lives in ways the world seemed unsure what to make of. Questions of whether or not we should let a disease drastically alter the way we live flooded the minds of many at first, but it ultimately became the right call for us to keep our butts at home and do what we can to prevent things from getting worse.
For me, this meant:
On the bright side, the crucial demand for us in California (and everywhere else tbh) to be sheltered in place wiped off nearly my entire agenda, leaving me enough time to complete what my girlfriend made me start (aka the revival of space and comfort in my home. Enjoy this pic of the room after cleaning 1/5 of it lol).
As a way to ignore the vast array of emotions I was feeling now that our lives hit the pause button, I sifted through countless storage boxes, aiming to rid my house of as much as I possibly could. The piles of treasured relics now labeled trash began to form, and I started to question why I held on to all this stuff for so long.
It instantly became clear to me that the objects I kept that I thought would grant me the ability to go back to a different time in my life were becoming both literal and metaphorical baggage in my house, preventing me from moving forward as the Charizard that I could be aka the true evolved version of myself.
When I was younger, I was one of those angsty teens that understood how fleeting a moment was. Cheesier than some nachos; I know.
But let me make my point.
I always grasped that things could not stay the same as badly as I wanted them to, so I held on to the tees, cards, toys, journals, and more that would give me the illusion that nothing has changed. These things that I promised would make me feel like I could turn back the clock to the moments that I’d rather be living in acted as the safety net I needed to fight my dark reality in the past, but now that I appreciated the current lifestyle I’ve adopted, what was keeping these items in storage really doing for me?
As a youngin it made complete sense to hold on to all of these physical representations of memories. But as I was deciding what I needed to let go, I realized that my romanticization of these moments from the past was leading to a misunderstanding of what mattered to me most. My love for my life’s history and the nostalgia it carried with it was put too high up on a pedestal, overshadowing the importance of both my present and my future being.
In short, I kept thinking that for me to be happy, I needed to go back to these moments rather than using my past to become that stage 3 evolution of myself. You see, holding on to these relics didn’t feel like the wrong thing to do at first; in fact, there was nothing wrong with holding on to them at all.
But the instant it became noticeably tough for my house to experience any change in its structure.
The second the nostalgia for how things used to be prevented me from progressing into the person I knew I could be.
It was time to move on.
It was time to let go of my old version of happiness in favor of the belief that things could change in a manner that didn’t leave me looking in my past for a puzzle piece that wasn’t going to fit anyway.
So that’s what I did. I let go of these objects taking up space but held on to what the experiences they represented taught me. In the process, my entire house is a lot cleaner to look at, my sister and I ended up getting our own rooms, and my mom can stop giving me the side-eye every time she looks at what used to be the downstairs dumpster.
When I think about the state the world is currently in because of COVID-19, I can understand the desire to wish things would go back to “normal” for the sake of the hardworking communities hit toughest during this pandemic. Now that our new reality is settling in and many are (ideally) recognizing the gravity of the situation, we’d likely be satisfied with a return to our old ways. That said, it is for those individuals and families that we must take the initiative to ensure that we come out of this predicament different.
We can’t let our nostalgia of “how things used to be” trick us into thinking that life pre-"shelter in place" was all that better; there was still much wrong with how society was run and how we treated one another during that era.
Now that we’ve been forced to reset and evaluate, it is our responsibility to explore what matters most to us and take action in protecting what we find important to create a new standard of how we treat ourselves and those around us in this life that we are lucky to be sharing.
I’m not asking you to do the impossible; I’m asking everyone as a collective to not let this time we must spend at home go to waste.
It’s up to you to determine how you do that.
Life after these next few months is sure to be different. At this point, it should be clear that the efforts we put in now will determine what that means for us. We could view this as a pause in life where nothing seemed to move in a positive direction for a few months, or we can take this time to come out of a terrible situation stronger than before.
There's nothing wrong with getting things back to the way they used to be, but there’s something beautiful in the hope that life doesn't necessarily need to be its former self for us to find the happiness that seems to slip out of our grasp every time our mind questions whether we have it.
In that sense, my current anxieties have calmed thanks to the understanding that I should just be grateful for what I have because even with how wild and seemingly uncontrollable these last few weeks have been, each day’s objective has been allowed to stay the same for me-- I’m still here trying to get me and those in my community to be better than we were yesterday.
https://www.instagram.com/ericearholes/
Support the brand:
https://spiffpasse.com/collections/frontpage/products/l-a-s-hoodie
]]>The following blog post can be broken into two parts.
Not gonna lie, it kinda feels like a bunch of word vomit because I couldn’t decide exactly what I wanted to say. If you make it to the end, I literally love you.
The Behind the Spiff read about the moments that led to this drop are important, but I figured you’re probably curious about the design choices I made when it comes to the Hidomi Hoodie. At first glance, this piece may look very similar to the other hoodies we’ve dropped, but each detail is actually packed with purpose. The Life After: collections are tailored to be authentic representations of me, so this explanation might seem a bit cheesy.
But that’s how you know it’s truly an extension of myself-- the cheese. lol
]]>I swear on Spiff that I have like 8 different drafts of how I was planning to start this blog. 8 different topics I wanted to talk about that would ideally describe what this mini Life After: drop meant to me. I tried to explain the struggle I went through to be myself, express my childhood spent as a wallflower, and describe the life-altering realizations I had at a music festival last summer, (all rad blog topics lol) but none hit the vibe I was desperately working to convey through the Life After: Hidomi Hoodie and its creation process. After literally weeks of contemplation, I realized I was being the Overthink King that I always am; I just needed to write.
The following blog post can be broken into two parts.
Not gonna lie, it kinda feels like a bunch of word vomit because I couldn’t decide exactly what I wanted to say. If you make it to the end, I literally love you.
The whole point of the Life After: collections is to grow as an artist and expand my arsenal of ways to create gear and art (what’s the difference between the two anyway?) that represents me. That said, I can’t tell you the exact date I started working on the Hidomi Hoodie without looking deep into the unorganized files on my laptop because I had the design set for months but was struggling to find the right type of printing to use to display my art on the gear. If I stayed in my bubble, I’d save myself the time and money it would cost to produce something different, but it would leave me unsatisfied with the final result.
I was set on doing anything but solely screen printing, DTG printing, or embroidery. It’s not that there's anything wrong with printing that way-- it was just something I had done time and time again. At first, I was adamant about using puff ink because of its throwback, high quality feel. Some of my favorite thrifted pieces feature this type of printing and it for sure elevates the clothes to a doper level.
However, when I previously attempted to use puff ink on the L.A.S. mock neck, I learned it wasn’t possible with multiple colors because the different paints would bleed into one another (This was sadly a dealbreaker for me because using loud colors is kind of my thing.). I wasn’t going to let that stop me from finding a style of printing that would give me the same vibe because I’d seen clothes, such as the Kids See Ghost merch, nail the aesthetic I wanted to achieve-- it wasn’t impossible. I just had to know what I wanted to get done.
Google quickly became my best friend. I sifted through videos and articles about clothing materials and talked to a variety of warehouses that made clothes, peeping their examples before finally deciding to bite the bullet and get a sample hoodie made using what was called foam printing. When I received the sample produced on a 70/30 cotton-polyester blend, I instantly fell in love, but I realized that my drawing of Hidomi on the sleeves would look best through a mix of both screenprinting and foam printing (the layers of color would be much more prominent if I used a combo of the two). I made the call to go through one more round of sample hoodies, and boom. The new Life After: hoodie was good to go and ready for production.
Months after the idea was drafted, it was finally time to hype it up.
The years of running a brand and organizing Spiff drops were beginning to take its toll on me because I was unintentionally setting up expectations that were tough for Spiff to meet. Life was beginning to get in the way, our time and energy was being stretched thin, and we weren’t selling as much as we used to. The combination of tiredness and self-imposed disappointment left me feeling like a robot and thinking that the build-up to releases didn’t really matter for a small brand like us.
It was like I was giving myself anxiety for nothing.
You see, I made the mistake of doubting myself. After years of posting on the Spiff IG every single day to express the process, I grew tired of pushing my message. Hell, I didn’t even know what my message was anymore because I was preaching ideas that sounded good but didn’t feel like what I was personally going through. I wrongly assumed that my efforts were unappreciated, so I stopped exerting the same type of energy I had been putting out since Spiff Passé was established.
I started dropping gear without telling its story. I still made sales, but the brand no longer made me happy. Spiff P. began to feel like another Instagram streetwear brand trying to get you to cop gear for the sake of copping gear.
It’s tough to admit, but if I knew how to quit, it was in this era that I probably would’ve done it.
But in the process of prepping for this new Life After: drop, I realized where I went wrong. I was no longer enjoying the work I was doing for Spiff because the pressure of being “successful” was wrecking my psyche.
I wanted so bad to be that dude who inspired you to do something. I wanted to convince everyone and anyone paying attention to the content I put out to believe that dreams could be made into realities. But like most, I wasn’t practicing what I preached. I fell into the trap that is social media and brainwashed myself into thinking that follows, likes, and views mattered more than the brand’s story (not the type that you just tap through; I’m talking about legacy). However, working on this Life After: hoodie and producing a piece that I cared about so deeply and invested so much time into was exactly what I needed to pull me out of the pit I was in.
Prepping for the latest L.A.S. drop gave me the positive kind of anxiety I had grown to miss. My desire to create was saved and the unwanted numbness and immunity to nervousness have faded now that I once again understand that the story behind the work I do and the build-up to the release is as important as the art itself. The entire experience I provide through Spiff P. is what y’all are supporting.
If I don’t care about the way I release the clothes and showcase collections, then why should you?
https://spiffpasse.com/collections/frontpage/products/l-a-s-hoodie
The Behind the Spiff read about the moments that led to this drop are important, but I figured you’re probably curious about the design choices I made when it comes to the Hidomi Hoodie. At first glance, this piece may look very similar to the other hoodies we’ve dropped, but each detail is actually packed with purpose. The Life After: collections are tailored to be authentic representations of me, so this explanation might seem a bit cheesy.
But that’s how you know it’s truly an extension of myself-- the cheese. lol
During the last 6 months of 2019, I did a lot of reflecting on whether I was actually happy or not. All that thinking led me to the realization that I had known what I had to do to earn my happiness, but I had found too much comfort in knowing that I knew.
Confusing, I know.
I completely understood what I had to do to live a fulfilling life-- I just wasn’t doing it. I literally had to look in the mirror and remind myself that there was more to my life than making sales.
I had to stop building a brand that’s concern was profit and start building a lifestyle that I could confidently claim was my brand.
For these reasons, the OG Spiff logo you likely recognize at this point is slapped on the hoodie in a reflected manner. The only way you’ll see it in the way that you’re used to is by looking in the mirror while wearing it. It’s my subtle way of telling you that 1. you look good. And 2. every once in a while you gotta look yourself in the eye to remember your purpose.
But if you don’t care about any of that, it doesn’t matter. The Spiff logo really just looks cool as hell reflected, confuses people who see it, and gets individuals asking you what your hoodie says. Wear it next time you visit your local coffee shop cutie. You’re welcome in advance for the conversation starter. ;) lmao
Oh, I also made the logo as big as I could to ensure that people see it.
I get that the minimalistic look never goes out of style, but Life After: products are meant to be seen. They’re works of art after all.
When I was in middle school, I had a bedtime of 10 PM. My parents were not that strict, but for some reason, this was the one thing my mom would constantly give me crap for. This wouldn’t really be an issue, but during that “late-night” timeframe, Adult Swim would start playing anime.
At this point, I’d see all the mainstream classics, like Pokemon, Dragonball Z, and Yu Yu Hakusho, so I was already pretty into anime. You could probably tell by my addiction to Crunchyroll and the Naruto wristband I rocked every day that I copped from Hot Topic that this was a passion of mine. But one night, I secretly turned on the TV, put the noise so low that I don’t even know if I could actually hear it, and changed the channel to Adult Swim.
Instead of the regularly scheduled program of Inuyasha and Fullmetal Alchemist, a show was on that I had never seen. It was put together in a one of a kind style that I didn’t even understand was possible. The first episode broke the fourth wall, mixed in manga panels, and showcased the angsty, coming of age story that embodied how I felt. Oh, and there were robot fights and guitars.
If you haven’t guessed by now, that show was FLCL aka Fooly Cooly. That night I ended up pulling an all-nighter because they decided to put on a marathon of the entire 6-episode series. Weird to say, but my life really hasn’t been the same since-- all I wanted to do after binging FLCL was make an anime just like it.
But as I grew older and entered high school, I tricked myself into believing that it stopped being cool to be into anime. Instead, I was influenced by the average teen society to focus my energy at getting at girls and fitting into a crowd I barely felt a part of. I’ve grown a ton since then, and honestly, this is an entire other blog post, so I’ll switch gears to finally get to the point.
When I got even older, I realized how dumb I was for acting like someone I wasn’t. I felt stupid for denying my love for anime in favor of looking “cool” to people who didn’t even really care about me. I figured that I had to make up for lost time, so I got the main character from FLCL Progressive (the series sequel that released more than a decade later), Hidomi Hibajiri, tatted on my left forearm. It was my way of “wearing my heart of my sleeve” and finally being myself.
I ended up drawing my own version of Hidomi and decided that I wanted to give y’all a taste of what it’s like to be me aka a person who now finds it impossible to be anything but genuine. I layered the drawing in two different colors and two different methods of printing to make it pop out and grab people’s attention. Then I reflected that design, changed the color, and slapped it on the opposite forearm because I wanted to stick to that theme of reflection. Plus, symmetry looks cool.
This art on this hoodie features 4 different colors: White, Red, Blue, and Lime Green. The balance of these colors is meant to complement the other Life After: products I’ve designed. In my opinion, the hoodie goes seriously dope with the L.A.S. Creator Vest and any of the Spiff Headwear. I could explain why, but I’d rather you just see it for yourself. I’ve already said too much in this post. lol
I used to struggle with being myself and let the judgment of others get the best of me, but that’s started to change as of late. When I designed the Life After: Hidomi Hoodie I included the following details to make a statement:
All these things serve a purpose and have been added to this hoodie to represent my desire to be nothing but authentic and teach you that you should strive for the same goal.
When you wear this sweater, there’s no hiding.
When you wear this hoodie, you’re embracing the fact that you’re not going to fit in, so you might as well stand out.
My girlfriend always tells me how important it is to leave people with an action item after having their attention. Here’s what I want you to do: create something of your own that means so much to you that you write a blog post as long as this one, explaining how your life was different after you brought that idea to life.
I promise I’ll read it.
When I started using the internet to push the streetwear brand you know as Spiff Passé, I made a promise to myself that I would be as authentic as possible and honest with my word. I stuck to my vow for a long time, but as the community began to grow and a few more eyes were on the brand, it was becoming tough to be transparent because I was worrying about what people thought.
In short, I was starting to act like something I wasn’t for the sake of public image. It’s not that I was being mad fake or anything; I just wasn’t telling the full truth. I fell into the trap of merely showcasing the wins and hiding the losses.
In comes the bucket hats.
I got a DM on Instagram from a former student of mine, telling me that if I made bucket hats it’d be an instant cop. Her words stuck with me for a while and I vowed that I’d get it done. Bucket hats remind me so much of the aesthetic of Stussy, which is one of my favorite brands. I wanted to pay homage to those that did it before me and figured I’d put my own twist on it using the OG Spiff logo and corduroy material.
I took some time to research different places that would make a cut-and-sew hat for me and stumbled upon the right supplier to do just that. They allowed me to determine essentially everything about the hat. I was allowed to pick the material, the color, and most importantly, the sizing.
Rad, right?
I thought so too until I realized that I knew nothing about making a hat. All I was sure of was that I wanted to make one that fit my big head. I asked the supplier what size the hats typically were and I was told they were made to be the average adult-size aka 58 cm. I figured I’d add 2 cm to this cause bruh. Have you ever seen two centimeters? It’s barely anything; it wouldn’t make that much of a difference, right? RIGHT?!
I could’ve made a sample, but the amount it cost to make one didn’t seem worth it compared to how much I would be paying to make the item in bulk. I decided the risk would be worth it, so I placed an order for 100 bucket hats (no cap) and played the waiting game.
A week later, they sent me a pic of the bucket hat that looked on point. I quickly approved it. Around 2.5 weeks later, the shipment was delivered, so I rushed home to open the package.
Initial reaction: Fire.
Reaction after putting the hat on: Still fire.
Reaction after Arvie tried it on: Good god that hat is huge. LOL
As I looked at the new Spiff product aka the oversized hat on Arvie’s head, I’d be lying if I told you this is how I imagined things playing out. The bucket hats weren’t thaaaaat big. I mean they fit my head, the homie Thomas’ head, my sister’s big ass head, and everyone else with a big head and/or a luscious head of hair. But I was hoping for a fit that was much more universal (I guess I kinda achieved this since it really is one size fits all lmao).
I considered ordering another batch of smaller-sized hats to have a S/M and L/XL option, but since we’re a small business it didn’t feel right to double our inventory at the moment. I thought about taking the L and not dropping these, using it as a promotional product to giveaway with each order instead. I talked to Arvie about it and he gave me his input, but it wasn’t until I met up with some Spiffterns, Michelle and Victoria, that it became clear what I had to do.
The two of them put the hats on and instantly noted that these were made for some big heads. I joked that I’d name it that so people would know what they were getting themselves into when they copped. We all had a good laugh, but the more I thought about it, the more I knew that was the answer.
These hats fit everyone.
If you got a smaller head, they give you a mysterious, cool dude vibe like Naota in FLCL (which is actually a big reason why I was so down to make bucket hats). If you got a bigger head, the hat looks like the appropriate size for once instead of that baby-sized type fit I know you hate. Given this information, what reason did I have to scheme and try to figure out a way around the fact that these bucket hats are bigger than I anticipated?
There was only one thing to do.
Be real about the product.
Our obsession over social media makes us feel like we aren’t allowed to take an L. Instead of willingly putting ourselves out there, we naturally only want to share our successes because that is typically what our confidence allows us to do. Why would anyone want their community to know that they did something wrong or took a risk that didn’t pan out the way they wanted it to? Because of these Big Head Bucket Hats, I remembered the answer.
In a digital world that makes us question what’s important, it’s refreshing to be real.
https://spiffpasse.com/collections/frontpage/products/big-head-bucket-hats
]]>
One of my favorite pieces of advice I give to those who feel lost and unsure of what their next step in life should be is to pick a dream they had when they were younger and less jaded. This could be starring in a movie, designing a house for your parents, starting your own brand (*wink wink), or going to space. The wilder the better (Mine is to make my own anime where everyone is wearing Spiff. P gear, but we’ll save that for another time).
Once you’ve decided which dream was most important to you, try and actually do it.
Seriously.
You’ll find that this will force you to do a variety of things.
Now I could explain this to you in terms of starting a brand (s/o Spiff P.), but for this blog post I want to mix things up. This concept would probably be better explained if I talk to you about the song “T.K.O.” that I dropped and made a music video alongside Burr, Arvz, and Iiinfinite.
When I was in high school, I started to get close with Arvie thanks to this TV/Film class we took where we were partners that made videos together. Things between us got pretty serious and he told me over a Skype session that he wanted to take things to the next level and go from a creative team to best friends (Lmao jk. Unless…). During these videochat seshes, Arvie would occasionally have a beat playing and force me to write some bars to it. He knew I loved literature and was decent at writing, so he wanted to motivate me to get out of my comfort zone and convert my knowledge of words into rap.
He would put the beat on for around 15-20 minutes, and we’d each try to come up with something. I’d be there reluctant as hell with a pen and paper in hand, anxiously awaiting the dreaded “Show & Tell” portion of the video call. However, there was never much for me to show. 15 minutes would go by and I would literally have nothing written down. Fear left me paralyzed and unable to create even though this task was meant to be done for fun. I was too embarrassed to take an L and write something that was likely to be shitty, preventing me from getting any better.
After I had finally graduated from college, got my teaching credentials, and established Spiff P. to a certain degree, I figured it was time for a new hobby to challenge me to grow. Since I was sharing a creative space where I was surrounded by the right people and equipment to create music, I figured it would be my loss not to utilize my resources; I decided I was going to do what I once felt was impossible and make a song. (Remember the life advice I mentioned earlier?)
I knew that I needed to train before I got to the point where I was ready to record at our home studio, and I couldn’t think of anything better to do to prepare than freestyle. For an entire summer, I’d hit up Thomas around 3-4 times a week and ask him to rap with me in an effort to improve. There are literally hours of footage of Thomas and I freestyling that I vow will never see the light of day, but I can promise you that this time spent was essential in achieving my goal. If I wanted to make a legit song I was proud of, I needed to take the baby steps by getting as many shitty raps out of my system as possible.
And for a few months, that’s exactly what I did. I rapped. It was trash. I showed Burr what I wrote. I sweated. Rapped some more. Convinced Arvie to rap. Rapped together. Made more trash. Until finally…
We dropped “Namaste.” We had more songs in the vault but felt like that one was good enough to release. A few weeks later, we dropped a song where I felt I properly showcased who I was and could be titled “T.K.O.” Thanks to the help of Burr and Arvz, I was now on 2 singles. I was pretty damn satisfied, but they wanted to level things up a bit and do something we thought was previously impossible.
“Let’s make a music video.”
After deciding that making a music video to “T.K.O.” would be a dope project for us to work on, we picked a day for us to link up, set it in stone through a Google Calendar invite (s/o Priscilla), and borrowed a stabilizer from the homie Andrew. It was honestly nothing fancy. We invested in a black backdrop which is literally just a sheet of cloth, used this pro light we borrowed from Arvie’s older brother, and recorded it using the camera Arvie saved up for. We made sure to dress in Spiff gear (Burr is even rocking an unreleased hoodie that is probably the most creative piece I’ve designed) because y’all already know we had to represent, and suddenly we were good to go. We filmed the entire video in essentially one night in the comfort of our own creative space using the equipment we cultivated throughout the past two years.
In the process of attempting to make one song, I ended up stepping out of my comfort zone multiple times, anxious sweating more than I ever wanted to, and surpassing what I had expected I was capable of. I went from being the kid who was too embarrassed to freestyle in front of his friend through a video chat to the former wannabe that’s going to make it if you trust. All I had to do was try.
Did the song pop off and become a number one hit? Nope. (not yet lol)
Does anyone even care about the shit I went through to get this all done? Maybe. (love you if you do <3)
Did I learn how to not give a fuck about what anyone says, set attainable goals that built habits that translated into other parts of my life, accomplish things that I personally feel are important, and up my sense of fulfillment and happiness? Yup.
]]>If chasing after an “impossible” dream did all that for me, then what is stopping you from doing the same?
Ever since I was a toddler whipping through the spiff streets of SV on my bike equipped with fresh training wheels, I’ve had this mad interest in tattoos. If you go into my fam’s vault of photos, you can find me in a tank top, flexing my freshly applied temporary tiger tatt while sipping on a can of 7-Up. My love for art contributed to it, but I know deep down that this obsession over tatts was born after my dad and I snuck into the bathroom so he could unveil an eagle holding a rose on his left shoulder in secret.
I have no idea how he thought he was going to hide it from my mom who had been adamant about her disdain for body modifications, but maybe that added to the appeal. My dad wanted this piece so bad that even his love for his wife (they just had their 26 year anniversary, so I know it’s real) was not enough to stop him from getting it, teaching me that there is a proper time to rebel against the norm and break out of our caves. He needed this tattoo to feel like himself for once; he could weather the storm of my beautiful mother’s rage if it meant he could get this permanent piece of art on his body.
My family has a history of anxiety. My dad, sis, and I constantly radiate this vibe of angst that we’re trying to keep tame at all times. It’s been a process trying to figure out what to do to properly function as a successful member of society, but we’ve found that accepting that we’re a family of black sheep (s/o Scott Pilgrim) is all we can do. Instead of trying to fit in, we now unconsciously do what makes us stand out, even if standing out isn’t necessarily the goal. It is a part of our nature to do what we want in a world that seems to want us to do everything but that, even if it means that all we’re attaining is an illusion of control.
As a kid, I didn’t quite understand why that tattoo was so important to him and something he was willing to get an earful for, but the older I get and the more life experience I gain, the more I comprehend the feeling. We don’t get to choose a lot of things in our life-- the circumstances we are born in are determined before we can even smile or open our eyes. The family we have, the home we live in, the way we look, and more are essentially out of our control. Hell, the shit that happens to us rarely feels like it was our own doing. But with tattoos it’s different. With tattoos, we get to choose.
EPILOGUE:
It’s been over a decade and a half since my dad got that first tatt. Since then, he’s gotten another eagle piece that covers his right shin and calf, and 10 days ago, at the age of 59, my sister and I had the honor of getting him yet another eagle tattoo placed on his left shin for his birthday/xmas gift. When we thought of the idea of copping him a tatt, my sister and I thought nothing of it, but as we excitedly shared the process of him getting it through social media, the reaction we got from y’all proved to us that this wasn’t as normal as it seemed. My dad still has anxiety and has no clue how to get rid of it. But my dad also still doesn’t give a fuck and does what makes him happy. So if you ever wonder how the hell I’ve made it this far given my circumstances, please know that it has a lot to do with the influence of my dad and his eagle tatts.
IN CASE YOU WERE WONDERING:
I once asked my dad why he always got tatts of eagles. He claims that he just loves the bird and thinks it looks cool, but on a different day, he also randomly mentioned to me that it was the favorite animal of his older brother that passed away when I was in middle school. When his brother left us, it was the only time in my life that I had ever seen my dad cry. I don’t think he realizes it and has never actually said it, but I like to think that all these eagles on his body are dedicated to him.
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PROLOGUE:
I’ve been striving to be more consistent with my blogging, so I took time to look back at the old work I produced when I was in college to get inspired. Back then, I was writing nearly every day, honing my skills to the point that putting together an essay was second nature. But few classes pushed me more out of my comfort zone than Creative Writing 101.
This 3-hour class was meant to be an easy A, and you could tell from the number of people leaving at the halfway point that only ¼ of the students were actually serious about getting better at crafting stories. I entered this class as the type of guy who wanted to improve but acted too cool to give a damn. However, every once in a while we were assigned a topic that got me to care about what I was writing and document my honest thoughts. The following essay was written 5 Decembers ago and focuses on my fear of the future I was paving for myself.
It must’ve been the first semester of my third year in college (my memory is kind of hazy and calculating the exact date is giving me a headache), and I was starting to worry about my place in the world again because the sappy life I had imagined involving my former high school sweetheart was clearly no longer a viable option. Instead, I was left to piece together my next move on my own and build a world that I would happy to take a part in.
The early stages of rebuilding were not easy and filled with the angst I never grew fully accustomed to. I was at war with myself because I had the desire to take the famous Spiderverse “leap of faith” but was unable to take action on my feelings. This short essay is nowhere near my best work, but it is one of the most honest pieces I’ve produced; I thought I’d share it with y’all to show you what was going through my head before Spiff P. started.
Eric Eroles
CW 101
Prof. Galjour
3 December 2014
Losing My Childhood
A couple of months ago I realized that I was losing my childhood. I was losing the carefree attitude I had in everything I did. I was losing the happiness I felt when I believed I could be anything I wanted.
Instead, I felt the hands on the clock ticking, thinking that I had no time to just enjoy myself. I felt the pressure of the responsibilities that accompany growing up and realizing you aren’t the same person anymore.
Bills are thrown at your face.
Friends you thought you would always have time for never seem to be around anymore.
Days to just kick back and chill are replaced with waking up to the alarm you set to remind yourself to finish the essay you couldn’t do the night before.
The kid who thought he could be an astronaut and an author at the same time became a man who was stuck in the same path every other person in college is forced to follow.
For years I was told that being an adult didn’t mean growing up; if I had the right attitude I was supposedly able to keep the same imagination and joy I had as a kid. But how could I keep the mindset of a child when I am constantly forced to deal with decisions about a future I am unsure about? How could I possibly drop everything I’ve done in college to pursue a different career? I feel like I just have to deal with the decisions I made as a teenager now that I’ve been in college for so long.
A couple of months ago I lost my childhood.
And now, I don’t even have the time to be sad about it.
]]>If you’re a serious brand, you quickly learn that each product you invest your energy into must have a story and a purpose. They don’t always have to be the most life-changing tale to tell, but if you don’t take the time to think about why you’ve created what you’ve created, you begin to become just another group of people dropping gear in a saturated market.
Initially, the thought process behind these beanies was simple. People have heads. They get cold. Let’s solve that issue lmao. Last year when we dropped the OG beanie, we sold out way faster than anticipated. People were digging the approximately 3-inch embroidered Spiff logo slapped dead center on what would be your new favorite piece of headgear, but we released them a little late in the season. It was becoming too hot for a restock. Instead, we opted to patiently wait for the next chilly time of year to provide y’all with the warm cranium you deserve.
After months of chilling (pun intended), the Spiff Team was at the early Halloween party thrown by the only and only JC. A few shots of water in, Bob (changed their name for the sake of privacy) and I got to talking.
“Yo! Let’s link up this Tuesday. Let’s get those beanies designed and ordered.”
“Down man.”
I made sure not to forget that short and sweet conversation throughout that blurry, Saturday night. We’d all been waiting to get these beanies made and the time had come for us to get this shit done.
So that Tuesday morning, I happily texted Bob to confirm our little date. It’d been a while since him and I were able to hang and work together thanks to the nature of growing older, so I was honestly hella looking forward to chopping it up and designing gear with him. But when I finally got that text back, I got a response I wasn’t expecting.
Bob got held at gunpoint in the parking lot of his own apartment complex. Some loser stole his phone and his backpack that had his laptop and hard drive. The full story is pretty insane and includes an unnecessary pistol whip; I’ll let you ask him about it lol.
After texting Bob and realizing that it would be tough to collab at the moment, I wasn’t sure how to proceed. One of my best homies got mugged--designing the beanie without him felt wrong. I really wanted to order the beanies that day so they would come in time for Arvie and I’s trip to Seattle, but I really, really, really didn’t want to design them without him. I kept imagining this scenario where I made the beanies on my own and the headwear ended up serving as a reminder to Bob of the day he got mugged. (I’m almost 100% sure that he would not be thinking like that at all and would’ve been happy to just have the beanies to share with y’all, but my dramatic ass couldn’t help but think this would be the case. lol)
So I waited. No product should be made if the vibe isn’t right.
Halloween came around and I figured it was time to give this another go. Bob and I couldn’t link up, but we could definitely text (he still had his iPad). We discussed his vision for the beanies, I threw in my perspective, we sent options to the team for everyone to vote on, and the rest is history. (My car got broken into that same day and someone stole unreleased L.A.S. creator vests, but that’s another story. Hahaha)
Shit happens. I've said it, you've said it, and my mom has probably said it in Tagalog. I've found that the best way to accept whatever life throws at you is to put in an honest effort to make new memories. It becomes easier to move on from the crap you have to deal with when your attention is on what's next instead of what just happened. In the case of these beanies, that's exactly what we did. I'm mad happy that Bob is alive and well; this release is for him.
Today, we’re dropping the first wave of what will now be your new favorite headwear. We’re giving you a taste of what’s to come by releasing the black, pink, and grey beanies with an embroidered SZN 2 logo blasted on it. These beanies are meant to be worn with pride. It is literally impossible to ignore the logo and will likely become the first thing people will see when you’re wearing it. If you’re rocking one of these, you’re telling the world that you rock with Spiff P. and our message. For that, we thank you.
https://spiffpasse.com/collections/frontpage/products/beanie
]]>The past 3 years I’ve been this broken record. What spewed out of my mouth was typically sentences about not being over my ex, the drawings of Flowe that I couldn’t stop producing post-break-up, and the Spiff gear I was trying to bring to life. It’s kinda annoying, but I always felt that if anyone were to try and understand this new drop aka Life After Sunflowers Vol. 1, they would have to understand those three things. It’s only right I explain all this one more time.
I dated this girl for almost 5 years. Kinda sorta fell in love with her in a “Babe, we’re gonna get married.” type of way. She was all teenage Eric could ask for; it felt impossible to see a future where being with her wasn’t part of the path my life followed. There were a ton of things to love about her but the one thing I never got over were her eyes; they looked like sunflowers that you could stare at all day. You’ll get that later.
The worst thing about falling in love is falling out of it. We used to be naive high schoolers who thought we’d get through anything. A couple years later, we’re insecure college students in a long distance relationship that was mentally ruining us. Things clearly weren’t the same, and I was struggling to accept it. My insecurities started acting up because instead of working on myself, I devoted my life to the idea that I had to be with this girl until the day I died. Pro Tip: Don’t do that. The actions I thought were benefiting our relationship were actually causing me to become toxic for her to be around. Luckily, she was smart enough to know she deserved better.
The worst thing about getting dumped is figuring out what to do with all the time you were used to dedicating to your significant other. Each second suddenly feels like hours of nothingness; that’s not really my cup of tea. After a solid week of crying, I literally had no idea what to do with myself. I turned to drugs for a bit, but knew I needed to transfer all this shit in my head and my ever so sensitive heart (lmao) into something of substance. Just had no idea what that would result in.
You know those moments in movies where the protagonist gets dumped, so they gather all the stuff their ex gave them and burn it in an overly dramatic manner? I figured that’d be smart to do. So I grabbed the box filled with gifts and notes and all that cheesy shit, filled it with more cheesy shit lying around my room, and got ready to hit Ocean Beach with my roomies (aka the Spiff Team) to have the saddest bonfire of my life.
But before we could all go, I stumbled upon this journal my now ex-girlfriend gifted me for our 4-year anniversary. I never used it, but when I opened it I saw a letter left for me written on the first page. She went into detail about buying me this journal with blank pages instead of lined ones because she thought I was “better off with something that doesn’t hold [me] back.” She promised that one day I’d “look through this [journal] and remember everything [I] experienced.”
This wasn’t my first time reading this letter; that’s what ticked me off. I remember asking myself why I didn’t take her words seriously before. Why couldn’t I see the creative individual she claimed I was? Why did I wait so long to work to be the artist I wanted to be as a kid? Why the fuck was I reading a letter from the girl who just broke my damn heart? (LOL)
I sat there for a minute, cruised over to the living room, and asked Vinesh if I could borrow the box of art supplies his sister lent him. I took a deep breath as I took out this container of mismatched colored pencils and crayons and ended up drawing what looked like really crappy hentai (I couldn’t draw hands, so I drew tentacles). But that's beside the point. I drew something, and for the first time in what must’ve been weeks, I felt like I was doing what I was supposed to be doing with my life.
When you get that sense of self back after being dumped, you can learn to channel all that negative energy clouding your thoughts into art that represents how you feel. Poems, doodles, essays, paintings, and more are born from the simple act of letting your emotions, positive or negative, take over and allowing yourself to bring to life what’s in your head instead of overthinking. Through this process, the contents of my journal were created, which then led to the concept of Life After Sunflowers.
Life After Sunflowers is the name I decided to give my life after getting my heart broken by the girl whose eyes looked like sunflowers. Flowe is the name I decided to give the character that was born through this heartbreak. Make sense?
So yes. This whole collection started because I got dumped and didn’t have a clue how to act. But as things naturally do when they are given genuine effort and attention, L.A.S. has become something more than that. I made Flowe to convey the emotions I felt during my lowest point in life; all I wanted was to tell her story through the medium I enjoy using best--streetwear. Now that I’ve had a chance to introduce her to y’all, it feels like the right time to make this anime-inspired branch of Spiff P. into the vessel that will contain the collaborations I work on with my friends. The idea is that I work with other artists to tell stories of their original characters that will exist in the same world as Flowe.
I’m not sure how to feel about a huge part of my life being defined by a breakup. Maybe it makes me a loser that can’t let go of my own baggage. Maybe it makes me dope af for turning my low point into a new high. Maybe it doesn’t matter at all. What I do know is that this is what it is. And I’m okay with that.
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