I always grasped that things could not stay the same as badly as I wanted them to, so I held on to the tees, cards, toys, journals, and more that would give me the illusion that nothing has changed. These things that I promised would make me feel like I could turn back the clock to the moments that I’d rather be living in acted as the safety net I needed to fight my dark reality in the past, but now that I appreciated the current lifestyle I’ve adopted, what was keeping these items in storage really doing for me?
The following blog post can be broken into two parts.
PART 1tells the story of all the things I went through to turn this hoodie into a wearable piece of art.
PART 2breaks down the artistic choices I made when designing the piece.
Not gonna lie, it kinda feels like a bunch of word vomit because I couldn’t decide exactly what I wanted to say. If you make it to the end,I literally love you.
The Behind the Spiff read about the moments that led to this drop are important, but I figured you’re probably curious about the design choices I made when it comes to the Hidomi Hoodie. At first glance, this piece may look very similar to the other hoodies we’ve dropped, but each detail is actually packed with purpose. TheLife After:collections are tailored to be authentic representations of me, so this explanation might seem a bit cheesy.
But that’s how you know it’s truly an extension of myself-- the cheese. lol
Our obsession over social media makes us feel like we aren’t allowed to take an L. Instead of willingly putting ourselves out there, we naturally only want to share our successes because that is typically what our confidence allows us to do. Why would anyone want their community to know that they did something wrong or took a risk that didn’t pan out the way they wanted it to? Because of these Big Head Bucket Hats, I remembered the answer.
In the process of just trying to make one song, I ended up stepping out of my comfort zone multiple times, anxious sweating more than I ever wanted to, and surpassing what I had expected I was capable of. I went from being the kid who was too embarrassed to freestyle in front of his friend through a video chat to the former wannabe that’s going to make it if you trust. All I had to do wastry.
As a kid, I didn’t quite understand why that tattoo was so important to him and something he was willing to get an earful for, but the older I get and the more life experience I gain, the more I comprehend the feeling. We don’t get to choose a lot of things in our life-- the circumstances we are born in are determined before we can even smile or open our eyes. The family we have, the home we live in, the way we look, and more are essentially out of control. Hell, the shit that happens to us rarely feels like it was our own doing. But with tattoos it’s different. With tattoos, we get to choose.
This 3-hour class was meant to be an easy A, and you could tell from the number of people leaving at the halfway point that only ¼ of the students were actually serious about getting better at crafting stories. I entered this class as the type of guy who wanted to improve but acted too cool to give a damn. However, every once in a while we were assigned a topic that got me to care about what I was writing and document my honest thoughts. The following essay was written 5 Decembers ago and focuses on my fear of the future I was paving for myself.
If you’re a serious brand, you quickly learn that each product you invest your energy into must have a story and a purpose. They don’t always have to be the most life-changing tale to tell, but if you don’t take the time to think about why you’ve created what you’ve created, you begin to become just another group of people dropping gear in a saturated market.
The past 3 years I’ve been this broken record. What spewed out of my mouth was typically sentences about not being over my ex, the drawings of Flowe that I couldn’t stop producing post-break-up, and the Spiff gear I was trying to bring to life. It’s kinda annoying, but I always felt that if anyone were to try and understand this new drop akaLife After Sunflowers Vol. 1, they would have to understand those three things. It’s only right I explain all this one more time.